just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
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