can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
