Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
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