But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
