Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Randomize
