He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
My liver is preforming stress tests.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Randomize