I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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