what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Randomize
