Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize
