Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
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