people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
I came so hard my ears popped.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
