I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
