I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Just puked most of my soul out..
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
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