Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
