what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
