dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize
