ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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