nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Randomize
