whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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