All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Randomize
