It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize