The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Randomize
