East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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