I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
We don't watch enough power rangers
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
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