i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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