we'll go far in life on tits alone.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize