3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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