carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
