either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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