She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
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