Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
