Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize