i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Randomize