The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
