OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Randomize
