I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
