My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
