i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
