that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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