i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
