You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
