This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
