Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Randomize
