how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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