I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Randomize
