After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize