God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
