you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
