I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
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