She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
That was before I lit my hair on fire
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
