i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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